Rural vs Urban Living#

For most of my life I’ve lived in more suburban areas. And, since this is what I’ve known and am comfortable with, this is often my “go-to” when looking for a home.

In fact, my tendency has always been to lean rural. I once went looking for a home that I could “sit on my front porch buck naked and nobody would know or care.” I wanted that privacy. I wanted that distance from others. I am not a terribly social person so being out in the sticks where I don’t have to deal with neighbors has always had an appeal to me.

The flip side of that desire is that I also tend to like convenience. I like having grocery stores, bookstores – especially bookstores – and the like near at hand. In addition to convenience, I also find that I do get a certain energy from being around others – in moderation. If there’s too much activity or the crowds are too large I quickly become overwhelmed. There is simply too much demand on my system. So there’s something of a fine balance between drawing energy from being in the midst of active people and becoming overwhelmed and shutting down in crowds.

Of course, finding a rural location that offered the kind of seclusion I wanted that is also relatively convenient isn’t easy. Well, mostly it’s impossible. So, when I lived in a more rural environment I found myself often driving into town for various reasons.

When my wife and I started seriously talking about retirement, we considered beach towns in Florida. One of the attractions for that lifestyle was that often a car wasn’t needed. You could walk or bike to many of the shops that you needed to visit and because the land is generally pretty flat, such excursions were not particularly taxing physically. This meant that we could get where we wanted to go fairly quickly and very inexpensively, all while getting in some good physical exercise that would help to maintain our overall health.

Well, the costs associated with living on the coast, together with the high heat and humidity and the general level of crowds, which tend to be large and overwhelming, finally convinced us that, perhaps, beach life wasn’t for us. So, what were our alternatives?

Over the last few years I’ve spent a fair amount of time learning about life in other countries. One of the features that stands out to me, particularly in European countries, is the convenience of being within walking distance of shops, grocers, and so on. The availability of public transportation which mitigates the need for a car is also a big attraction. Owning a vehicle is expensive. Car payments, insurance, fuel, maintenance, all of those costs add up. I can pay for a LOT of Uber rides for what it costs to own a vehicle. So the idea of living in a place where a car isn’t needed is very appealing. And, if public transport is not readily available, biking is a valid alternative and one that appears to be fairly common in many European towns.

That knowledge has led me toward considering more urban living. As I said above, the convenience factor, plus not needing to rely on a car has a certain appeal.

A friend is going through a divorce and we’ve had discussion about where she should live. Like me, she is conflicted. On the one hand she wants the privacy that rural life affords. On the other, her current situation is such that she does not have a car. As we talked about her future, we floated the idea that perhaps she needed to consider finding an apartment in town. One near the bus line. This has many benefits for her. Apartment living means no yard work or house maintenance. Yes, she may pay more in monthly rent, but I’m pretty sure that’ll be offset by the savings from costs of maintenance, yard work, and general care on a home. Living on or near a bus line means that she doesn’t need a car to get around. She can get most places by using the bus system. That will save a ton of money annually! And, again, if she locates well, walking or biking offer valid alternatives for going places.

My wife and I are currently happy where we are. Our home is new, designed pretty much to our specifications, and meets our needs. We’re suburban in an area that is not amenable to walking or biking to conveniences. And, we don’t have the privacy that we might like. But, at least for now, we have no plans to move. That said, we’re also not averse to rethinking our decisions and may do so in the next few years.

I’m still on the fence about living in town. The noise, the congestion, the people, the lack of privacy, all are of concern. The question is whether the benefits of convenience outweigh the drawbacks.